Why I’m Kicking Valentine’s Day to the Curb

I think I’ve finally hit my fill with Cupid and his Valentine’s Day crap.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I’m over it.

Those of you who have your Prince Charming and life all full of sparkles and unicorns are just making it worse on those of us dealing with the real world.

Because that ‘happy ever after crap’ where nobody argues and life is all sunshine and smiles is just a fairy tale for most of us.  And maybe, you’re just a really good pretender and it’s fake for you, too, and the meds you’re on are just making it seem like it’s happy land every minute, because I don’t know a single couple that agrees on everything and argues never.

For most of us, this crap is hard.   When we promised to love each other forever, we weren’t thinking about how tough it would be when he lost his job, or she lost her mind…we were just counting on more good days than cruddy ones.  And that doesn’t always happen.

I know the utter euphoria of love when it’s good.  When it’s freakin’ great.  What an amazing high.  Followed by a hell of a crash.

You see, with some of us, that lovey dovey phase is much shorter than it really ought to be.

Take me, for example.

I’m not looking for perfect (well, that’s a lie, I’d love to find perfect).  But I’m good with just really good the majority of the time.

Some days I think I have that….but then, I see your annoying posts all over Facebook or Instagram about how damn amazing your man is…how he got the kids up and dressed so that you could sleep in, or surprised you with a cruise around the world—or bought you blingy jewelry that sparkles enough that people on the moon can see it– ‘just because’.

Can you do me a favor and keep that crap to yourself?  Because you’re killing those of us who are still trying to get this love thing all figured out and are hanging on by a thread trying to keep it together.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m happy for you.  Let me clarify that.  I’m happy for you if you’re a good person who genuinely earns that love with your ginormous (that’s gigantic and enormous merged—which is bigger than big) heart and genuine caring for your mate each and every day.  But too often, the people I see declaring their great fortune in soul mates are people who most of us consider to be real bitches.  They’re mean girls. Who aren’t even NICE to their guys.  And this somehow has earned them undying affection from the opposite sex?  Someone needs to explain that to me.

I play by the rules.  I am patient (harder than you can imagine for me) and kind.  More than kind.  I am loyal and true.  I am generous to a fault.  And I give people a second chance because I know sometimes we do stupid things when we, well, when we’re being stupid.

But this hasn’t led me down the path to perfection.

It has led me to a land I call Jaded. And fighting like mad to focus on the good and not the bad, which is a bit off balance sometimes.

I’ll admit I’m a little bit crazy.  You would be, too, if you’d been through the ‘adventures in love’ that I’ve experienced.

I always thought Cupid could just shoot that little arrow and make it so I found a man who would be my ideal match.  The missing piece in my puzzle.  You know, my perfect mate.

But I think after all these years of trying, I have to accept perfect just doesn’t exist.  Not in a man and certainly not in me.  Good enough sounds like I’m settling, and that’s not ok with me.  I’m saying I don’t need a dozen roses every morning when I wake up…he could pick me a blade of grass to show me he is thinking of me, because with me, it truly is the thought that counts.

I want my guy to show me he cares every day, not just Valentine’s Day, so Cupid can pack the arrows away and kick this stupid lover’s holiday to the curb.

It’s ok if he leaves his chocolate here, though.