Empty Nester Travel Bender
After 29 years of raising kids, of taking care of the house, the children, pets, and other adults during certain phases of my life, I finally found myself “an empty nester”. And I have to admit, as much as I love my children, I was eagerly awaiting this new chapter of my life. I had big plans for this time when the youngest was off to college and the older kiddos were beyond it. And a big part of those plans involved what came to be known as my “Empty Nester Travel Bender”.
That’s not the original name. I adopted the name after seeing another friend on a similar adventure, calling it her travel bender. I considered it the perfect name and ran with it. At first, I just thought of it as an extended vacation without any children along; a time when I could go where I wanted, when I wanted, and not have to worry about making sure anyone else was packed properly, or even wanted to be along on the journey. It was about what *I* wanted, going wherever my desires took me. And I couldn’t wait.
I started planning it more than a year before the youngest graduated high school. I knew from experience that, even if you were looking forward to the freedom, it was hard when your child left home, and with her being the last one, who I was particularly close to, I didn’t want to be sad when she left. I knew I needed to have something to look forward to, and one of the things that makes me happiest is travel. So, planning a big adventure was my way of making sure I wouldn’t be devastated when I came home to a house alone. Sure, I’d miss her, but having something of my own to look forward to would easen that expected sadness. So I planned, and I planned, and I planned some more.
Because I knew it was going to cost a bundle, on top of the cost of college for the last kiddo, I started working extra hours and saving up what I could to afford to take this dream trip. Just a couple hundred dollars a month adds up in a year or two, and was exactly what I needed to not feel guilt over treating myself to the big splurge of running off on this dream trip. And let me say, it was worth every penny. And then some.
So, how did I go about planning where to go, or when?
Well, the kiddo asked that I not take off the day I dropped her off at school in another state. She requested I give it a month, to make sure she was settled and happy, and I obliged. But that didn’t keep me from booking my departure flight for one month after dropping her off, or booking flight after flight after flight for all the countries I wanted to see while I was gone, along with hotels or Airbnbs for each city, and then, in cases where excursions or museum visits were likely to sell out or have limited attendance, I’d book those tickets, too. But I also made sure to leave room for spontaneous fun, as well.
In my case, my starting point was based on where I found the most affordable airfare from my home airport in Atlanta. It was to a city I’d always wanted to see (Lisbon, Portugal). But that part is irrelevant. You can start anywhere. For me, the trip was about seeing many places, and experiencing all kinds of cultures, and absolutely meeting unforgettable people. So, I set out to spend three days in each city, which I know isn’t long, but in most cases, allowed me to get a good feel for the vibe of each place. There were regions I would have loved to have spent longer, of course, but the point was to explore the world, not just one city, and I stuck to that plan, for the most part. I bounced from Lisbon to Seville, to the South of Spain. Then on to Amsterdam, where I wanted to experience things I’d never tried before, but also got to finally walk into the Anne Frank House, a place I’d read about way back in 6th grade. I then went on to Munich, Germany, and my visit coincided with the last few days of Oktoberfest. What an experience that was, and something I believe everyone should attend at least once. From there I went to Dubrovnik, Croatia, where I believe I could have stayed forever. The history, the beauty, the people…it was everything. My travels then took me to Barcelona where I connected with a good friend, and based myself for a few weeks while still exploring different cities each weekend. Whether it was wandering around the monastery and mountain at Montserrat, which is a short train ride from Barcelona, or flying off to Venice where I had experiences like a private gondola ride with musicians, or Capri, where a shoemaker created a pair of sandals custom-designed specifically for my feet.
Some of the time, I was on my own exploring, while other times, my boyfriend came along for the fun, and at one point, even my daughter, who I’d dropped off at college, flew over to meet me and join me on one of the Italian adventures. And of course, I met all kinds of people along the way. There weren’t any strict rules about any of it, as long as I only had to worry about myself. After all, that was the point of the trip: To make the most of my time no longer being responsible for other people and things.
And I will say, it was epic. All of it. Not the part where I left my wallet with my license, credit card and most of my cash in a taxi in Seville (I did manage to get the wallet, license and credit card back, but not the hundreds of euros). Or the part where my passport fell out in the Barcelona airport after I’d gone through customs (though in that case, the customs agent literally came and found me at my gate to return it to me, saving me of a massive heart attack). Of course there were other hiccups, like boarding trains going the wrong direction, or barely making flights, but that all became part of the story, and some of the unforgettable memories I made on this adventure of a lifetime.
If you have the opportunity to ever do the same, I really hope you jump at the chance. Make it happen if you can. I knew the timing wasn’t ideal, but what time ever is? You’re worth it. Go make those dreams happen!
